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The Endurance of a Long-Distance Writer

January 5, 2013 By Shae Hadden

yoga poseYear two of book writing. My ultimate endurance test. And, amazingly, a source of focus and joy. No matter what comes of this manuscript, I know I’m not wasting my time. I’m learning. And I’m becoming who I want to be.

This week marks the beginning of the rewriting. I’m actually having fun, seeing what’s good and not so good, diving in and giving it everything I’ve got. No holding back this time round. It’s like inviting all the pieces of myself that have been floating around, waiting for just the right moment to come together, to coalesce into the ‘blue pearl’ that is me. No saving for some future, as if this part of my life is a dress rehearsal.

It’s not about this book being good. It’s about it being as great as it can be. That means I need to be patient enough to hold back the manuscript until it’s ready.

It also means I need to develop the endurance of a long-distance writer. As a species, we’ve been favored when it comes to running long distances. Unlike other animals, we can sweat, thereby reducing our body temperature and avoiding overheating. We have short toes, increasing the efficiency of our foot movements. We can store energy as fats in tissue and as glycogen in our liver and muscles.*

When it comes to long-distance writing, I’m not sure we have as much going for us in today’s world. We’re inundated with calls for our time, energy and attention—from media news to overflowing email inboxes, expectations for socializing and keeping up with the Joneses. It’s only a few days into the new year, and I find myself being even more rigorous about what I do with my time than when I was doing the initial writing. And, interestingly, even more interested in developing my physical stamina so I can complete this book and do the work I want to do for the long haul.

So, yes, I went to the gym today to get reacquainted with the equipment and the exercises. Not because I made a New Year’s Resolution to get fit or strong. But because that’s what I need to add into my wellness mix right now, along with yoga and swimming, to fully reclaim my health. It’s been a long 5 years making my way back…but the next 5 are going to be great! Perhaps by 2018, I’ll even be able to do this yoga pose….

* “The Human Body is Built for Distance”, Tara Parker-Pope, NY Times (2009)

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Photo credit: Flickr, Ron Sombilon Media, Art & Photography – Western Canadian Hatha Yoga Championships

Filed Under: Writing Tagged With: commitment, learning, persistence, self-awareness, time, writing

Chrysalis: Getting Out of the Way

October 27, 2012 By Shae Hadden

Writers often talk of needing to retreat to write at some point in their creative process. Of a need to let things gestate and emerge in their own way, in their own time—almost as if writing is a chrysalis process. All my research, my writing, my life has plodded along this past year. Slow caterpillar movements shifted to a sudden breakdown in the last few weeks. And now the creation of something entirely new from all that has gone before.

San Francisco’s glorious sun feeds my smiles today. I love life enough to want to create many, many more days here—or somewhere very much like it (if such a place exists). For here I feel at home. The very air of conversations among my colleagues here generates me as a powerful creator.

In chrysalis, the speed at which imaginal cells
Coalesce and form themselves into lines and clusters
My ego cannot keep up with.

I feel my wings forming, the sun on my back.
This life is for me.
It’s not the life I expected.
And I’m grateful.

I’ve given up trying to control what’s happening. I’m curious to see what is emerging. Curious also to see who else will show up in the days ahead. 

All my focus now is on being an opportunity for infinite game players, as James Carse defines them. People who play with boundaries, rather than within them. Whose purpose is to keep the game going as long as possible. Who see me as an opportunity to realize what they envision is possible, and whom I see as an opportunity to contribute to as a co-creative ally.

Wanna play?

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Filed Under: Writing Tagged With: creativity, opportunity, transformation, writing

Focus on Creating

September 30, 2012 By Shae Hadden

I love creating. Actually, I love creating what matters to me in the moment. Each completed creation becomes a foundation for new creations. The more I exercise my creating, the more creations I complete, the easier it is to conceive of something I couldn’t see before.

I’ve found it difficult in the last while to let go of some of my old creations. Ones that mattered to me very much when I was making them. But now, if I’m really honest with myself, they do not resonate with what matters most to me in this moment. Hanging on to them out of fondness or obligation or responsibility has me stuck. Hanging on to them feels egocentric, like a painter attached to their canvas, unwilling to sell their creation when millions of art appreciators could be enjoying it. Not that I’ve done anything wrong in owning my creations. It’s just time to let go and focus again on creating.

“When you are creating, where is the focus?
In the real creative process, it is on the creation and not on one’s self.”
Robert Fritz, Creating

A new era in my life beckons.

This week I brought a list of what I want to create next in my life to my coach. After seeing the number of items, he reminded me that I don’t have to create them all simultaneously, and that there is wisdom in choosing which ones to focus on first. And so, I selected my top 4 picks. I don’t have reasons for why these particular 4, and why not 4 others. Or even why I want any of what I want. These things matter to me simply because they matter to me.

No justification required.

What are you consciously choosing to create in your life today?

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This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Filed Under: Choice Tagged With: coach, creativity, responsibility, time, writing

GPS Unrest

September 23, 2012 By Shae Hadden

Have you ever found yourself without a GPS device, driving in the dark late at night, looking for a sign indicating you’re heading in the right direction? I don’t know about you, but for me, as time goes by, I find it increasingly difficult to remain calm and confident that the last choice I made was the right one. I have no idea whether I’m heading straight into difficulties or moving closer to my destination. So I drive with a bit more caution, a bit less speed, until I find a sign or until there’s more light on the situation.

When we’re on the road to realizing our vision, GPS radio signals and signposts can sometimes elude us. Let’s be clear here. I’m no Pollyana. I expect to experience frustration and loss in my life. Just as I expect to experience joy and abundance.

What I hadn’t expected in my book-writing journey was to encounter this state of uneasiness at this point. The signs have been clear all along that this is the way I have to go. There must be something I’m missing, something I haven’t done or something I haven’t said to have me be anxious now. Something’s out of sync or I wouldn’t be craving some rest from this GPS unrest.

A coach and dear colleague reminded me this week of the following quote.

“…it is the way he has to go, the journey toward it is the only life he enjoys. It is hard; it is exciting; it is satisfying, lonely, joyous, frustrating, puzzling, enlightening, real; it is his life, that’s all. He accepts it.”
Paul Williams, Das Energi

And another dear friend, also a coach, reminds me often that “The only way out is through.”

So I’m choosing to rest with my unrest, to keep moving my body through time and space, to do things that ground me in the present. And meanwhile, consider where I’ve been hesitating to act or acting with hesitation. Wherever my intentions and actions are out of sync.

These will be my signposts.

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Filed Under: Self-Awareness Tagged With: coach, commitment, risk, time, writing

The Edge

September 16, 2012 By Shae Hadden

Every vision we create has an edge—a boundary that defines what lies ‘in our sights’ and what lies outside our sights. When we call up a vision, we also call up what is not the vision. The edge between what is and is not what we’re committing to making real is where we can learn and grow.

My energy and attention have been primarily focused on making a book about being coached become ‘real’. What I haven’t seen (until now) is that, to bring it into existence, I also called forth things that resist this creative act. Things that, if I choose them, could pull me towards shape-shifting and altering my vision so that it conforms to what already exists, to what is normal, sane, reasonable.

So often we stop engaging with our vision when we get to this edge. We give up. Or we steamroller ahead and “stick to the original plan”. We disconnect from what’s wanting to emerge in us and through us.

In doing so, we miss the opportunity to look at and explore the places we couldn’t see or that we didn’t want to see before we declared our commitment to creating something that doesn’t exist yet. We miss the opportunity to look at what we most need to engage with to grow. This is where my coaches are invaluable. They help me see my learning edge.

“If you limit your choices to only what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise.”
Robert Fritz

So now I’m looking at everything that’s showing up that is not related to my book. And pondering whether the possibilities I’m seeing need to be made real now…or later…or not at all.

I’m pushing at the edges of my vision, expanding it to include all of my life.

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Filed Under: Commitment Tagged With: coach, commitment, learning, resistance, writing

What’s Emerging?

September 1, 2012 By Shae Hadden

Writing this book is an exercise in being with emergence. Patterns emerge out of the multiple conversations I’ve been having with coaches and coachees. Out of those patterns emerge multiple threads of ideas. And as I write those ideas down, a structure emerges from within the writing. It’s as if I could step aside and let the cosmos of the book grow into being.

“In all chaos there is a cosmos, in all disorder a secret order.”
Carl Jung

I don’t have to make it be organized. I can be part of what’s emerging.

It’s like those instances where things just spontaneously organize themselves—where the meaningless chaos we fear arranges itself into something new. Like a traffic pattern. A market trend. A complex of buildings. A network of relationships.

What are you allowing to emerge in your life?

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Image by O12 from Pixabay

Filed Under: Transformation, Writing Tagged With: coach, coachee, transformation, writing

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