Shae Hadden

writing

GPS Unrest

By

Have you ever found yourself without a GPS device, driving in the dark late at night, looking for a sign indicating you’re heading in the right direction? I don’t know about you, but for me, as time goes by, I find it increasingly difficult to remain calm and confident that the last choice I made was the right one. I have no idea whether I’m heading straight into difficulties or moving closer to my destination. So I drive with a bit more caution, a bit less speed, until I find a sign or until there’s more light on the situation.

When we’re on the road to realizing our vision, GPS radio signals and signposts can sometimes elude us. Let’s be clear here. I’m no Pollyana. I expect to experience frustration and loss in my life. Just as I expect to experience joy and abundance.

What I hadn’t expected in my book-writing journey was to encounter this state of uneasiness at this point. The signs have been clear all along that this is the way I have to go. There must be something I’m missing, something I haven’t done or something I haven’t said to have me be anxious now. Something’s out of sync or I wouldn’t be craving some rest from this GPS unrest.

A coach and dear colleague reminded me this week of the following quote.

“…it is the way he has to go, the journey toward it is the only life he enjoys. It is hard; it is exciting; it is satisfying, lonely, joyous, frustrating, puzzling, enlightening, real; it is his life, that’s all. He accepts it.”
Paul Williams, Das Energi

And another dear friend, also a coach, reminds me often that “The only way out is through.”

So I’m choosing to rest with my unrest, to keep moving my body through time and space, to do things that ground me in the present. And meanwhile, consider where I’ve been hesitating to act or acting with hesitation. Wherever my intentions and actions are out of sync.

These will be my signposts.

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Image by StockSnap from Pixabay

The Edge

By

Every vision we create has an edge—a boundary that defines what lies ‘in our sights’ and what lies outside our sights. When we call up a vision, we also call up what is not the vision. The edge between what is and is not what we’re committing to making real is where we can learn and grow.

My energy and attention have been primarily focused on making a book about being coached become ‘real’. What I haven’t seen (until now) is that, to bring it into existence, I also called forth things that resist this creative act. Things that, if I choose them, could pull me towards shape-shifting and altering my vision so that it conforms to what already exists, to what is normal, sane, reasonable.

So often we stop engaging with our vision when we get to this edge. We give up. Or we steamroller ahead and “stick to the original plan”. We disconnect from what’s wanting to emerge in us and through us.

In doing so, we miss the opportunity to look at and explore the places we couldn’t see or that we didn’t want to see before we declared our commitment to creating something that doesn’t exist yet. We miss the opportunity to look at what we most need to engage with to grow. This is where my coaches are invaluable. They help me see my learning edge.

“If you limit your choices to only what seems possible or reasonable, you disconnect yourself from what you truly want, and all that is left is a compromise.”
Robert Fritz

So now I’m looking at everything that’s showing up that is not related to my book. And pondering whether the possibilities I’m seeing need to be made real now…or later…or not at all.

I’m pushing at the edges of my vision, expanding it to include all of my life.

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

What’s Emerging?

By

Writing this book is an exercise in being with emergence. Patterns emerge out of the multiple conversations I’ve been having with coaches and coachees. Out of those patterns emerge multiple threads of ideas. And as I write those ideas down, a structure emerges from within the writing. It’s as if I could step aside and let the cosmos of the book grow into being.

“In all chaos there is a cosmos, in all disorder a secret order.”
Carl Jung

I don’t have to make it be organized. I can be part of what’s emerging.

It’s like those instances where things just spontaneously organize themselves—where the meaningless chaos we fear arranges itself into something new. Like a traffic pattern. A market trend. A complex of buildings. A network of relationships.

What are you allowing to emerge in your life?

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Image by O12 from Pixabay

Bestselleritis

By

“B is for bestseller.”
Mark Haddon

I’ve spent some time over the last month listening to several experts sharing their experience writing best-selling books. I figured I might as well see what wisdom resonated with me—after all, these individuals have become gurus by succeeding at selling many, many books over time. A few tips later, I’ve got cauliflower ears from listening to hours of talking heads on headset … and a new realization.

There must be a lot of people out there looking for help with starting, finishing and promoting their book. Eager people who have their hearts set on writing a bestseller—and only a bestseller. Otherwise, how could these experts be in such demand for sharing their expertise on how to be wildly successful in the book industry?

I define this compelling aspiration, this writer’s condition, as “Bestselleritis”. Symptoms can include:

  • Ÿ  A burning desire to be on the NY Times Bestseller List
  • Ÿ  An initial belief that bestsellers happen overnight
  • Ÿ  An obsession with what it will be like to be famous
  • Ÿ  Recurring conversations about writing a bestseller
  • Ÿ  An allergy to writing
  • Ÿ  A file folder of great story ideas
  • Ÿ  An archive of incomplete manuscripts
  • Ÿ  A fully booked schedule for the foreseeable future

Wisdom from people who have gone before can be helpful in dealing with this condition. I’ve learned that the following pills, although sometimes hard to swallow, can further alleviate uncomfortable symptoms.

  • Ÿ  Be committed to writing. Trust the process and stay focused.
  • Ÿ  Be disciplined. Do the work.
  • Ÿ  Be humble. Admit you don’t have all the answers.
  • Ÿ  Be willing to give up other things in life. Put aside distractions and take the small steps, day after day, that add up to success.

At the end of the day, completing and promoting this book is my responsibility—and mine alone—with or without expert help.

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay

Adventure

By

“Writing a book is an adventure. To begin with, it is a toy and an amusement. Then it becomes a mistress, then it becomes a master, then it becomes a tyrant. The last phase is that just as you are about to be reconciled to your servitude, you kill the monster, and fling him to the public.”
Sir Winston Churchill

I ran across this quote today. A dear friend sent it to me a few months ago when they heard I was starting to write my own book. Still somewhat in shock that I had actually listened to the still small voice inside that had been prompting me for years to become a published author, I had put the quote aside to see if things would play out as Churchill described.

I’m six months into the project now, and I have to agree with Winston. Writing a book is an adventure. I consider this to be my first big Helen Keller “life is a daring adventure…or nothing” risk. Not in an Indiana Jones daredevil world traveler kind of way. More like a “being pregnant for the first time” kind of adventure.

Like a baby, this book has a life of its own. It’s changing and forming itself inside me as I watch. It pulls my energy, my time and my focus. I have to feed myself with ideas and experiences and conversations that nourish its growth. I’m reorganizing my life to support my health and well-being as it develops. This ‘baby’ is transforming me. This book is  literally changing my life.

So far, nothing about it has been a ‘toy’ or an ‘amusement’. It is my child … and it is my ‘mistress’.

This past week, I began writing again. I’ve been preoccupied with health issues and work for the past month, so it’s wonderful to come back to my notes  and really start to dig into what I like doing best: integrating ideas and communicating a succinct message in prose. I’m falling in love with my book. Each moment I spend with the manuscript is like a private bit of bliss. I entwine myself in each story. I feel my way into each sentence, caressing the words gently. I close my eyes, focusing for a final kiss, as I sense the ripeness of each chapter and deftly retrieve a title from the air.

I know many more experiences of being coached and many more coaching conversations await me. I welcome them with gratitude and an open mind.

But what I’m looking forward to most this summer, what turns me on each morning, is the thought that every day I’ll be expressing my love—of coaching, of people, of life—through my words.

I wonder whether Churchill was right about the rest of the adventure…?

Creative Commons License

This blog post by Shae Hadden is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported License.

Image by Andreas Wohlfahrt from Pixabay